musesfool: (shakespeare got to get paid son)
[personal profile] musesfool
Today's poem:

I Have News for You

There are people who do not see a broken playground swing
as a symbol of ruined childhood

and there are people who don't interpret the behavior
of a fly in a motel room as a mocking representation of their thought process.

There are people who don't walk past an empty swimming pool
and think about past pleasures unrecoverable

and then stand there blocking the sidewalk for other pedestrians.
I have read about a town somewhere in California where human beings

do not send their sinuous feeder roots
deep into the potting soil of others' emotional lives

as if they were greedy six-year-olds
sucking the last half-inch of milkshake up through a noisy straw;

and other persons in the Midwest who can kiss without
debating the imperialist baggage of heterosexuality.

Do you see that creamy, lemon-yellow moon?
There are some people, unlike me and you,

who do not yearn after fame or love or quantities of money as
         unattainable as that moon;
thus, they do not later
         have to waste more time
defaming the object of their former ardor.

Or consequently run and crucify themselves
in some solitary midnight Starbucks Golgotha.

I have news for you—
there are people who get up in the morning and cross a room

and open a window to let the sweet breeze in
and let it touch them all over their faces and bodies.

--Tony Hoagland

*

(no subject)

Apr. 22nd, 2025 10:41 pm
marina: (:D happy Gracie!)
[personal profile] marina
Well, it's been 2 weeks since my last post, so here's an update.

mentions of health issues )

*

In job news, something pretty huge and happy-making has happened???

One of the 4 companies I interviewed with has gotten back to me (after like 7 stages) to say they want me to work for them and they'll send me a contract offer in the next few days (which is standard). Fingers crossed, nothing certain until papers are signed etc, but. BUT.

It's been over a year, and finally I have a job offer.

At least one company wants to pay me a decent salary with all the nice perks and everything.

Now, if I had no other offers and was not in the running for any other position, I would take this one IN A HEARTBEAT. I would take it and be SO GRATEFUL.

But since I am still somehow in the process with 3 other companies, I'm in the weird position of mentally wondering which one I'd choose if they were to make me an offer.

Company #2 - I've finished all the interviews, and they're supposed to get back to me tomorrow on whether they want to check my references, which usually takes 1-2 days and is more of a formality. There's good reason to assume that if they say yes to me tomorrow they'll make me an offer next week.

Company #3 - I'm doing my final interview with them on Thursday, a big presentation, and after that they'll let me know if they're interested, no reference checks. If they want me they'll just make an offer.

Company #4 - the actual company of my heart, that all other considerations aside I would probably choose to work for because I love their product so much - I'm doing my final interview with them on Monday (next week). Of course they have the WORST HR process, so I actually have no idea what their next step is and whether there's something else they'll want to do before deciding yay/nay after Monday.

Now I'm mostly stressed because Company #1, that's already told me they want me, will probably try to pressure me to finalize a contract with them before Company #4 has a chance to decide whether they want me, sigh.

All of these potential roles are so good. None of them are "I can live with that" compromises. All of them are amazing, it's more a question of specific types of amazing, and of course I ideally want the combination that works best for me.

It is utterly surreal to be in this position after a year and 2 months of being unemployed. UTTERLY SURREAL.

But you know, maybe all the other companies will reject me and only Company #1 will remain, which will still be perfectly fine and even great.

Or maybe I somehow manage to fuck up this whole thing and will be left with nothing ////o\\\\ IDK it's just too good to be true at the moment.

Phew. Deep breath. The next 2 weeks will be continued stress, especially since I have a big presentation on Thursday and on Monday, but then... then. I don't know. Maybe, just maybe. *fingers crossed*

this picnic is no picnic

Apr. 21st, 2025 06:08 pm
musesfool: Princess Leia (so what level up)
[personal profile] musesfool
Monday miscellany:

- So what are the odds we get an antipope this time in addition to a pope?

- Sepinwall gave season 2 of Andor a good review (minor spoilers, I guess) - the first 3 episodes drop tomorrow and it sounds like they are doing 3 episodes a week for 4 weeks, as each one comprises a mini-arc. Trying not to get spoiled on the internet is sure to be a nightmare.

- I haven't done the AO3 stats meme regularly since 2018 because not much changes in my top 10. In 2021, however, I made note of some up-and-comers in the 11-20 slots, and it turns out that as of 4/20/25, Post Hoc, Ergo Propter Hoc (i.e., the one where Dick convinces Jason to stop killing through the power of hugs) has crept into the top 10 by hits - it's number 9! (It looks like Our history is just in our blood (history, like love, is never enough) (the Steve/Bucky remix AU where Steve finds Bucky working as a barista) is the one that fell out of the top 10.)

Post Hoc, Ergo Propter Hoc also made inroads into the top 10 by kudos, landing at number 5! Additionally, 2 Star Wars stories also found their way into the top 10 by kudos: There's Still Time to Change the Road You're On (in which Anakin time travels to the post-RotJ era and meets his kids) at 6, and deep as a secret nobody knows (AU where Leia tells Vader she's Padme's daughter and it changes everything) at number 8!

The 3 Avengers stories that dropped are again, Our history is just in our blood (history, like love, is never enough), plus Even a Miracle Needs a Hand (Clint/Darcy fake Christmas boyfriend), and with the lights out, it's less dangerous (Steve/Bucky, then and now).

According to these posts, I did not previously do the full list by comments, but I will note the appearance of deep as a secret nobody knows at number 3 on the comments list, and another Vader-and-Leia AU, Just a Little Bit of History Repeating, at number 10, with the VMars/Avengers crossover we travel without seatbelts on sitting pretty at number 7.

So I guess given enough time, these things CAN change.

- Today's poem:

Nothing Will Warn You
by Stephen Dunn

Nothing will warn you,
not even the promise of severe weather
or the threats of neighbors muttered
under their breath, unheard by the sonar

in you that no longer functions.
You'll be expecting blue skies, perhaps
a picnic at which you'll be anticipating
a reward for being the best handler

of raw meat in a county known
for its per capita cases of salmonella.
You'll have no memory of those women
with old grievances nor will you guess

that small bulge in one of their purses
could be a derringer. You'll be opening
a cold one, thinking this is the life,
this is the very life I've always wanted.

Nothing will warn you,
no one will blurt out that this picnic
is no picnic, the clouds in the west
will be darkly billowing toward you,

and you will not hear your neighbors'
conspiratorial whispers. You'll be
readying yourself to tell the joke
no one has ever laughed at, the joke

someone would have told you by now
is only funny if told on yourself, but no one
has ever liked you enough to say so.
Even your wife never warned you.

***

Catching up on various shows

Apr. 21st, 2025 06:19 pm
selenak: (Demerzel and Terminus)
[personal profile] selenak
Daredevil Reborn: overall, good finale. I'm not shipping anyone on this show (or its predecessor), but I was amused, given that Luke Cage managed to make "coffee" a synonym for sex back in the Netflix day for all the Marvel shows, that Frank expressed the wish for coffee with both Matt and Karen. (Not at the same time.) On a more serious note, the finale evidently went for an Empire Strikes Back vibe in that spoilery stuff happens )

Wheel of Time S3 finale: speaking of Empire Strikes Back vibes... Though in this case just in one plot line. Okay, two, technically. (The second one being Team Elayne, Matt, Min and Nyneave not gaining what they wanted to, but what Nynayve did get was so important that I hesitate to equate this with the goings on at the White Tower.) This, too, is based on a book series written many years ago, and was shot way back when yours truly hoped the world would be less insane in 2025 than it actually is, but can't help but feel extremely on point with its spoiilery stuff )

Doctor Who ?.02: amusingly weird, technically impressive, everyone looks gorgeous in their costumes. But Fourth Wall Breaking stories are not really my thing, and so I can't say I loved it.

Easter Wells 2025

Apr. 20th, 2025 01:53 pm
selenak: (Linda by Beatlemaniac90)
[personal profile] selenak
Even Darth Real Life is not able to keep me from my annual Easter Well sight seeing, or the pic spam based on it. Happy Easter to all who celebrate, and hopefully good holidays to everyone:


Heiligenstadt gesamt


More Easter Wells await beneath the cut )

the indivisible wave of your body

Apr. 19th, 2025 05:40 pm
musesfool: hardison/parker/eliot = ot3 (your desire for explosions and larceny)
[personal profile] musesfool
I made these confetti cookies from Smitten Kitchen this afternoon (pic), but unfortunately, they are way too sweet for me. They are really easy to put together though, especially with the food processor, since you don't need to soften the butter and cream cheese before you get started, and there's no need to chill them before baking.

In other news, I watched the 3 available episodes of season 3 of Leverage: Redemption and enjoyed them, though there was some cognitive dissonance in seeing Noah Wyle as Harry Wilson after 15 intense episodes of The Pitt. Aldis Hodge gets more handsome every time I see him, and the gloves have come off in terms of the writing - they are not even playing anymore about how stuff that is legal still isn't right. Plus, there have been some fun guest stars: casting spoilers ) I look forward to the rest of the season!

***

I haven't posted any Neruda in a while, so here's today's poem:

Sonnet XLVI

Of all the stars I admired, drenched
in various rivers and mists,
I chose only the one I love.
Since then I sleep with the night.

Of all the waves, one wave and another wave,
green sea, green chill, branchings of green,
I chose only the one wave,
the indivisible wave of your body.

All the waterdrops, all the roots,
all the threads of light gathered to me here;
they came to me sooner or later.

I wanted your hair, all for myself.
From all the graces my homeland offered
I chose only your savage heart.

-Pablo Neruda
(Trans. ???)

***

the shape of wind against a sheet

Apr. 18th, 2025 09:10 pm
musesfool: a loaf of bread (staff of life)
[personal profile] musesfool
I decided to make the King Arthur pretzel rolls again today (well, half the recipe to make 4 hero-shaped buns) - they only require a first rise of 1 hour and a second of 15 minutes so I could start them at 3 pm and be eating by 5:30. I proofed the dough in this nice bowl I have that has its own lid, and I did it in the unheated oven with the oven light on (I've never done it like that before but I've seen it recommended a few places), and about 50 minutes in, there was a loud popping sound, and it turned out that the carbon dioxide produced by the rising dough popped the lid right off! That had never happened to me before! I figured if that was happening, the dough was proved and it was. They turned out delicious. Definitely recommended.

Here's today's poem:

Singe

I read the tops of the poems, ten or twenty lines down.

In the beginning of the book, a man is leaving his wife
for a lover. By the end, the lover is tired of the man, who wonders
if he made a mistake. The book has the quality of a diary,
the beginnings of poems imply the ends of other poems, other days,
this is a man to know in the morning.

It's raining here, where the book lives for now, and the mood
of fog fits the sadness of the book, I hold it out the window,
bring it back and dry it off with my shirt.

I know a woman who knows the poet. I call her and ask
which tops of poems are true. She wants to know why I don't
finish the poems. I tell her I dreamed last night
I work inside a steam shovel, that the tops of the poems
are my sky, my white clouds. It's impossible to talk
to just one poet, and I'll feel the ears
of people I don't know floating behind me for a week.

There are two children in the book. They must be in college by now,
married or incapable of marriage. I believe the poet was honest
about their names, I consider finding and e-mailing them,
asking if they felt betrayed or like rock stars, some other kind
of celebrity, I suddenly want to know if they play tennis
or like Pop Tarts, if either drove up to see their father
and threw the book at his head, the stab marks on the cover
making him break down and apologize for the hurt, not the poems.

Calvino had an idea for a book that appeared to have been pulled
from a fire. What wasn't there would be as much of the story
as the little bells, the indentations of eye teeth in a pencil,
the shape of wind against a sheet. The bottom of this book
is on fire, is where the lies have fallen, where someone
tells someone they were never loved, where a body is rhapsodized
as the font of renewal, and eight pages later, deplored as snare.

I devise solace for the book: we should count birds, I tell it,
should ride a horse, you and I. Some other time I'll read
the bottom only, read this life and turn each page
with both hands, carry the words in the basket of my flesh,
carry them over, carry them safe, some other time, nor was it ever
too late.

—Bob Hicok

***
musesfool: miranda otto smiling (on the edge of summer)
[personal profile] musesfool
Today's poem:

The Game
by Lorna Crozier

So many conversations between
the tall grass and the wind.
A child hides in that sound,
hunched small
as a rabbit, knees tucked
to her chest, head on her knees,
yet she's not asleep.

She is waiting with a patience
I had long forgotten,
hair wild with grass seeds,
skin silvery with dust.

It was my brother's game.
He was the one who counted,
and I, seven years younger,
the one who hid.

When I ran from the yard,
he found his gang of friends
and played kick-the-can
or caught soft spotted frogs
at the creek so summer-slow.

As darkness fell,
from the kitchen door
someone always called my name.
He was there before me
at the supper table;
milk in his glass
and along his upper lip
glowing like moonlight.
You're so good at that, he'd say,
I couldn't find you.

Now I wade through
hip-high bearded grass
to where she sits so still,
lay my larger hand
upon her shoulder.

Above the wind I say,
You're it,
then kneel beside her
and with the patience
that has lived so long in this body,
clean the dirt from her nose and mouth,
separate the golden speargrass from her hair.

*
musesfool: barbara howard, abbott elementary, smiling (let me see you smile again)
[personal profile] musesfool
I was doing so good with reading books again but alas, I have had the 2nd Finlay Donovan book open in the same spot for a week and instead have been reading fic or watching tv. So have some quick thoughts on TV I have watched:

Silo: I enjoyed this - the first season is better, but the second season has its moments! Unfortunately, Steve Zahn is like a BEC for me, so that put a damper on parts of season 2. Like, he's a decent actor or whatever but he makes me want to turn off my TV every time I hear his voice.

The Residence: I enjoyed this a lot and I hope they make as many seasons of it as Uzo Aduba wants, perhaps in really fancy buildings every time, though I hope they are slightly tighter in terms of story telling - 8 episodes was slightly too much imo.

Abbott Elementary: this season has been a lot of fun and I will be watching the finale tonight!

Elsbeth: still enjoying this also, though I've been doling out the episodes more slowly now that I'm like only 1 behind the current episode.

Severance: I have avoided saying much about this show since for me it's a very mixed bag (great acting, beautiful cinematography, wonky pacing, questionable writing) and I know a lot of people love it, but I hope Tramell Tillman has a long, highly decorated career as a leading man in action movies, musicals, rom-coms, and whatever else his heart desires. I am also always happy to see Dichen Lachman on screen!

Wheel of Time: I have been enjoying this as well, though 8 episodes feels too short given everything that they are covering (note: I haven't read the books and currently don't plan to). spoilers ) Let them all sing more! The singing has been GREAT.

And lastly, here's today's poem:

Object Permanence
by Hala Alya

This neighborhood was mine first. I walked each block twice:
drunk, then sober. I lived every day with legs and headphones.
It had snowed the night I ran down Lorimer and swore I'd stop
at nothing. My love, he had died. What was I supposed to do?
I regret nothing. Sometimes I feel washed up as paper. You're
three years away. But then I dance down Graham and
the trees are the color of champagne and I remember -
There are things I like about heartbreak, too, how it needs
a good soundtrack. The way I catch a man's gaze on the L
and don't look away first. Losing something is just revising it.
After this love there will be more love. My body rising from a nest
of sheets to pick up a stranger's MetroCard. I regret nothing.
Not the bar across the street from my apartment; I was still late.
Not the shared bathroom in Barcelona, not the red-eyes, not
the songs about black coats and Omaha. I lie about everything
but not this. You were every streetlamp that winter. You held
the crown of my head and for once I won't show you what
I've made. I regret nothing. Your mother and your Maine.
Your wet hair in my lap after that first shower. The clinic
and how I cried for a week afterwards. How we never chose
the language we spoke. You wrote me a single poem and in it
you were the dog and I the fire. Remember the courthouse?
The anniversary song. Those goddamn Kmart towels. I loved them,
when did we throw them away? Tomorrow I'll write down
everything we've done to each other and fill the bathtub
with water. I'll burn each piece of paper down to silt.
And if it doesn't work, I'll do it again. And again and again and -

***

Wednesday Reading Meme

Apr. 16th, 2025 07:07 pm
sineala: Detail of Harry Wilson Watrous, "Just a Couple of Girls" (Reading)
[personal profile] sineala
What I Just Finished Reading

Nothing, but that's because I had a bunch of migraines, had to prep ten issues for the YGMAH book club, and had to keep writing stuff for the fic exchange. Sometimes, in the five minutes before I fall asleep, I think about maybe reading a book.

What I'm Reading Now

Comics Wednesday!

Iron Man #7, Sam Wilson Captain America #4, Superior Avengers #1, Ultimate Wolverine #4 )

What I'm Reading Next

Not sure. I am typing The Art of War on Entertrained, solely because it's the shortest book. I can hit, like, 35 wpm with punctuation and everything currently, which is approaching my QWERTY speed, but I need more muscle memory.

6x agatha harkness fic recs

Apr. 16th, 2025 08:34 pm
kimaracretak: (agatha)
[personal profile] kimaracretak
Uhhhhh it was meant to be Agatha All Along fic recs but then a Wandavision one snuck in. Anyway I keep seeing fic rec lists and going 'wow! all of those sound boring and awful and like the fics were written for a totally different show!' so I made my own. Alphabetical order by title, minimal warnings, these authors almost certainly have other good A3 fics that I didn't rec, yknow, all the Kimara Makes A Rec List staples. Weirdly weighted towards smut, to an extent I wasn't expecting.

allow my love to find her brutal way to me. agatha all along, agatha/rio, billy, mrs hart. 9.1k words, rated e. by [personal profile] thiswildernessismyhome.
Rio just wants one conversation with Agatha. One. And if she has to trap them both in a time loop to make it happen, so be it.

Fic that made me think 'yeah okay I'll believe the show's version of Nicky specifically so I can read this fic reacting to it'. Which is not a thing I thought I would ever say, but here we are, the Rio voice in this is that good.

body of work. agatha all along, agatha/rio. 38.k+ words (wip), rated e. by [archiveofourown.org profile] gnawingsuspicion
Throughout history, Agatha Harkness has left behind no shortage of casualties. As her power and body count grows, she catches the eye of Death herself.

Fic that doubles and triples and quadruples down on YES Agatha's an unrepentant mass murder and YES magic is super fucking weird and YES Rio is Death is also not human. Still a WIP so possibly will lead to regrets later, but eh, the first seven chapters are probably one of my favourite backstories for them I've seen.

don't give it a hand, offer it a soul. agatha all along, agatha/rio. 2k words, rated e. by [archiveofourown.org profile] HenryMercury
The sweet things she says are always bait.

Road sex ft asphyxiation.

don't look now. agatha all along, agatha/rio. 10.3k words, rated e. by [personal profile] thatyourefuse.
So it turns out, when you get to the bedroom, there's nothing fucking there: you should've expected as much.

Have rec'd before will rec again this is one of THE defining Agnes-spell fics, all unsettled memories and identity grief, and menstrual sex.

the kindest thing (is to never leave you alone). agatha all along, agatha/rio, alice/rio, agatha & alice. 4.3k words, rated m. by [archiveofourown.org profile] spillentireuniverses.
In the cabin, Rio faces her biggest obstacle yet: a genuinely good person. (or, the time loop fic where Death drags Alice Wu-Gulliver, rather unwillingly, back to life)

Rio doesn't understand how she can eat Agatha whole. Rio makes this Alice's problem. Alice is not Not okay with this despite her best efforts.

until next time. wandavision, agatha & wanda. 3.8k words, rated t. by [archiveofourown.org profile] mothersquared.
One day Agnes woke up and went to the square. Every day Agnes woke up and went to the square.

Pyschological horror (psychological fun!) in the immediate aftermath of Wandavision, ft Wanda facing the consequences of her own actions.

you are only a visitor on this dark earth. agatha all along, agatha/rio. 7.1k words, rated e. by [archiveofourown.org profile] moonmotels
Agatha + Rio + testing the limits of love

Domesticity but make it WrongTM (the best kind of domesticity for them).

their flux and gush, their roar

Apr. 15th, 2025 08:30 pm
musesfool: orange slices (orange you glad)
[personal profile] musesfool
I'm pretty sure I'm going to stay home for Easter this year, so now I need to decide what I'm going to cook. I thought about making the fancy French chicken, or maybe a traditional ham, or I could make crepes for breakfast and then manicotti for dinner (though that seems like a lot of work). I also want to bake something but what? A strawberry galette? Some other strawberry tart type thing (using frozen strawberries)? Strawberry sticky buns? Clearly my brain has focused in on something strawberry but it doesn't have to be! Small batch cheesecake? Confetti cookies? or maybe I will bake some more bread? I'm off both Friday and Monday, so there's time to do several different things, but I just need to decide what and then tailor my shopping list accordingly.

Work continues to be super busy thanks to the search committee stuff on top of all our other work, but aside from some scheduling that is going to be a nightmare, we should have a couple of weeks off from dealing with meetings with them.

Here's today's poem:

Water on Mars
by Clare McDonnell

for Susan

Mars has the memory of water
carved into her parched rock.

Does she remember rivers;
their silkiness, their languid drawl,
their flux and gush, their roar,
clots of frogspawn, green weeds waving?
Did she understand the pebble talk of water,
delight in the twinkle of sun and shade
and the sudden shimmer of fish?

Was there once someone there
who saw a lake as flat as a polished table,
the surface so tense that insects hardly
dented it, darting between lily pads?
Did he notice how wrinkles halo out when
a swallow dips for flies, or how the breeze
strews handfuls of sparkle over the water?

Was there an enormous ocean there
whose curled tongue was shredded on rocks?
Did it suck the sand from beneath a poet's feet
leaving him in unsteady wonder?
Did his child cup handfuls of spilled sun
from its surface, let it seep through her fingers
to become water again, licking her ankles?

In winter, did rain slap him with glass hands?
In summer, did it finger his face softly,
bring back aromas to dryness,
plump up the wall's cushion of moss?
And when it stopped, did each lupin leaf
hold a diamond between its fingers,
was the fissure a stream, did the red rock steam?

***
selenak: (Default)
[personal profile] selenak
My attempt to watch the new series House of David came to a swift end when about twenty or so minutes in, we were told by Michal in voice over that the Amalekites and their King were evil Cannibals (in addition to being evil tormentors of the Israelites). Now it's been years and years, but as far as I remember from Deutoronomy, a) the Amalekites/Israelites conflict sounds pretty standard for ancient world warfare between neigbouring tribes, with neither having the upper hand for long, until b) Samuel, speaking for God, orders Saul to wipe them out (as in, men, women, children and livestock) and Saul doesn't do that completely but lets the King and some of the livestock survive, and that is why God's favour is taken from Saul and transferred to David. Now, divine orders to commit genocide sound quite different to 20th century onwards people for all the obvious reasons, but making an entire group of people into essentially fantasy Orcs is surely not the answer in how to tackle that narrative. I remember the 1985 movie King David (starring Richard Gere, not exactly a cinematic masterpiece, but actually trying to do engage with the biblical story beyond the "plucky little guy vs giant, little guy wins" narrative of David vs Goliath) making the repeated clashes between Prophets and Kings (not just Saul vs Samuel, but also later David vs Nathan) be a power struggle similar to the medieval Emperors vs Popes ones, with neither side the eternal good guys or eternal villains, each side sometimes is in the wrong and sometimes in the right from our then 20th century perspective), with the order to wipe out an entire people exactly as appalling presented as it sounds like.

From what I remember, the aborted series Kings which tranferred the entire Saul, his family and young David saga to the 20th century, didn't really do an equivalent of the Amalekites story but did not present anyone as evil cannibals, either, but heavily leant into the "everyone is shades of grey" interpretation. In German literature, the most famous work engaging with the David story is probably Stefan Heym's Der König David Bericht. (Stefan Heym: German Jewish writer, escaped 1935 to the US, post WWII returned to East Germany, had a complicated relationship with the East German government from 1956 onwards.) To simiplify a complicated book, in Der König David Bericht, Solomon after David's death commissions a book glorifying his father, our investigating hero inevitably comes across all the crappy stuff David did as well, and despite him already toning this down in his report, Solomon decides to while not killing the investigator surpress the report entirely and to add insult to injury steal Ethan the investigator's wife and claim authorship of a love song Ethan wrote about her. This novel was published in West Germany first in 1972 despite Heym still living in East Germany, in East Germany a year later, and in the Westt definitely was seen as Heym tackling Stalinism, the rewriting of the past and censorship by the state in his present via the biblical story.

The second most famous German written novel engaging with these biblical stories is Der Brautpreis by Grete Weil. Like Heym, Grete Weil (who was friends with Klaus and Erika Mann in her youth) was a German-Jewish writer who escaped the Nazis but in harder conditions - she went to exile in the Netherlands, not the US, which meant that once the Nazis arrived there, she could only survive in hiding. Which she did, but her husband was captured, sent to a concentration camp and murdered. Der Brautpreis is written from Michal's pov, and in Weil's interpretation, Michal's falling out with David whom she hid and saved his life when her father Saul persecuted him is not because, as in the bible, she scorns his dancing; she stops loving him out of disgust when he pays the bride price her father demanded as part of the power struggle between the two men, said price (biblically) consisting of a hundred Philistine foreskins. By doing this (and even doubling the price), David stops being who Michal fell in love with and reveals himself no better than who he fought against.

Note what both writers have in common: they don't focus on the "David vs Goliath" part of the story, though it is in there. Just not as the main story. What I find fascinating about the biblical David is how complex a person he comes across, because the biblical version does heroic as well as ruthless or egotastic things, and not just from the 20th century onwards pov; obviously David sending Uriah to his death so he can have sex with Uriah's wife Bathseba is meant to be a bad thing in the contemporary context as well.

For me, the most compelling part of that particular story and what makes me never entirely lose sympathy with David is the aftermath, i.e. when God according to Nathan punishes David and Bathseba by taking their first born child. As long as the child is sick, David does penance and is on his knees praying and fasting. When the child dies, he stops doing this, gets up and starts eating again, to the confusion of his attendants. And then we get this:

21 His attendants asked him, “Why are you acting this way? While the child was alive, you fasted and wept, but now that the child is dead, you get up and eat!”

22 He answered, “While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept. I thought, ‘Who knows? The Lord may be gracious to me and let the child live.’ 23 But now that he is dead, why should I go on fasting? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me.”

24 Then David comforted his wife Bathsheba, and he went to her and made love to her.


This reaction to loss and grief is so viscerally relatable to me.


On a personal level, this also why the young David in Kings is the least interesting character in the show to me - he's too good to be true golden retriever boy, with not even a hint of the moral ambiguity to come - and why I'm still looking for a fictional David who fine, can start out as a well meaning youngster, but should show the potential for the future ruthless King, while conversely older and old David should be not just another tyrant, that would be going too far in the other direction. (And okay, obviously the relationship with Jonathan should be there and important, looking bewildered at you, Kings, for letting the two be hostile rivals instead of bffs with at the very least homoerotic undertones.) Because this new show on Amazon Prime had been called House of David, not David, I had been hoping they were aiming for the entire story, including later on the complete mess that are David's children. But I can't get over the Amalekites as bloodthirsty cannibals in the very first episode to find out, and the fact the show felt it needed to do that doesn't augur well for future complexity anyway.
musesfool: Rachel Roth (Raven)  from Titans (it will take all your breath)
[personal profile] musesfool
Today's poem:

The Five Stages of Grief
by Linda Pastan

The night I lost you
someone pointed me towards
the Five Stages of Grief.
Go that way, they said,
it's easy, like learning to climb
stairs after the amputation.
And so I climbed.
Denial was first.
I sat down at breakfast
carefully setting the table
for two. I passed you the toast—
you sat there. I passed
you the paper—you hid
behind it.
Anger seemed more familiar.
I burned the toast, snatched
the paper and read the headlines myself.
But they mentioned your departure,
and so I moved on to
Bargaining. What could I exchange
for you? The silence
after storms? My typing fingers?
Before I could decide, Depression
came puffing up, a poor relation
its suitcase tied together
with string. In the suitcase
were bandages for the eyes
and bottles of sleep. I slid
all the way down the stairs
feeling nothing.
And all the time Hope
flashed on and off
in defective neon.
Hope was my uncle's middle name,
he died of it. After a year I am still climbing,
though my feet slip
on your stone face.
The treeline
has long since disappeared;
green in a color
I have forgotten.
But now I see what I am climbing
towards: Acceptance,
written in capital letters,
a special headline:
Acceptance,
its name in lights.
I struggle on,
waving and shouting.
Below, my whole life spreads its surf,
all the landscapes I've ever known
or dreamed of. Below
a fish jumps: the pulse
in your neck.
Acceptance. I finally
reach it.
But something is wrong.
Grief is a circular staircase.
I have lost you.

***

and sometimes we drove just to drive

Apr. 13th, 2025 04:35 pm
musesfool: typewriter with the words 'never be afraid' typed (don't be afraid of anything)
[personal profile] musesfool
I have not yet been able to gather my thoughts about The Pitt's season finale, but [personal profile] serrico has some great thoughts here and [personal profile] siria has some here.

I also have a bunch of links (spoilers everywhere!):

+ The Pitt’s Noah Wyle & Co. Talk Taking Robby to the Very Edge in Finale and ‘Getting Mentally Healthy’ in Season 2

+ The Pitt’s Shawn Hatosy Loved Abbot at First Sight

+ ‘She Just Needs Therapy and a Hug.’ The Pitt’s Isa Briones doesn’t need you to like Dr. Santos but hopes you can empathize with her.

+ The Pitt Season 2 Premise [spoiler] and Premiere Month Confirmed

+ ‘We Try to Keep the Sensationalism to a Dull Roar’ As The Pitt shuts down season one, the next shift is taking shape for creator R. Scott Gemmill.

+ The Pitt’s Next Shift

I really need to get some icons for this show.

***

And today's poem:

Letter to My Great, Great Grandchild

after Matthew Olzmann

Oh button, don't go thinking we loved pianos
more than elephants, air conditioning more than air.

We loved honey, just loved it, and went into stores
to smell the sweet perfume of unworn leather shoes.

Did you know, on the coast of Africa, the Sea Rose
and Carpenter Bee used to depend on each other?

The petals only opened for the Middle C their wings
beat, so in the end, we protested with tuning forks.

You must think we hated the stars, the empty ladles,
because they conjured thirst. We didn't. We thanked

them and called them lucky, we even bought the rights
to name them for our sweethearts. Believe it or not,

most people kept plants like pets and hired kids
like you to water them, whenever they went away.

And ice! Can you imagine? We put it in our coffee
and dumped it out at traffic lights, when it plugged up

our drinking straws. I had a dog once, a real dog,
who ate venison and golden yams from a plastic dish.

He was stubborn, but I taught him to dance and play
dead with a bucket full of chicken livers. And we danced

too, you know, at weddings and wakes, in basements
and churches, even when the war was on. Our cars

we mostly named for animals, and sometimes we drove
just to drive, to clear our heads of everything but wind.

--JP Grasser

***

Very random question

Apr. 13th, 2025 11:52 am
muccamukk: Abe has a question. (Hellboy: Question)
[personal profile] muccamukk
Does anyone know what this character is?

It's not a full stop! It breaks html that needs a full stop.

Also, how did I end up using it? I must have accidentally copied it? From somewhere?
muccamukk: An orange life ring floating in the sea. (Misc: Lifering)
[personal profile] muccamukk
Haven't done one of these in a while and ended up having to trim out stuff that happened a month ago.

U.S. Politics )

There is not a Canadian Politics section because I find our election too depressing. Here's a good interview on The Breach. Which came out before the NDP started to properly implode. Fuck.


Cool/Fun Stuff:
JSTOR Companion to the Schomburg Center’s Black Liberation Reading List.
JSTOR has created an open library to support readers seeking to engage with BIPOC+Q-authored reading lists like the one developed by the New York Public Library.

CBC: 46 Canadian nonfiction books to read in spring 2025.
I don't remember why I bookmarked this, because I'm not going to look at it again, lol.

Oglaf: Historical Adventure.
One NSFW panel, best summary of The Three Musketeers I've ever seen.

The Wiggles and Orville Peck: Friends of Dorothy 🦖💕.
No notes.

National Theatre's The Importance of Being Earnest: 'I'm particularly fond of muffins' & 'Mr. Ernest Worthing is engaged to me!'

CBC: These are the 1st images of humpbacks having sex, and they're both males.


Blake Lively v. Justin Baldoni:
I'd be depressed about Depp v. Heard repeating itself, except Lively isn't stuck with bargain basement lawyers, so it's going rather better for her. (Okay, so, "whoever has the most expensive lawyers wins" is a terrible system, but it's at least mildly satisfying when the person you want to win has the most expensive lawyers and the better case.) I've been spending probably too much time following this because I want the win. Not that invested in the actors, but am invested in harassment-free workplaces. Read more... )


Various YouTube Videos:
[youtube.com profile] CaelanConrad: J. K. Rowling: The Real Story.
From 'homeless single mother with unheated shoebox apartment' to 'self-made billionaire feminist', PR spin and reality diverge.
Mostly about how the Rags to Riches mythology got overblown, with various other digs along the way.

[youtube.com profile] OlurinattiBITES: The Problem with Jonathan Majors’ Redemption Tour.
This is like one of those encores where the performers don't even bother to leave the stage.

[youtube.com profile] JoshJohnsonComedy: Adolescence Is #1 on Netflix—and It’s Got the Manosphere Shook.
Title's a bit clickbaity, this summary is better: The show deals with topics like the manosphere, red pill, incels, and the coded language teenagers use to communicate ideas around the topics. This set reminded me of my own struggles as a young man and how things could have gone very differently for me. It's very funny, and very warm-hearted and sweet, given the topic.

The Blue Box is back!

Apr. 13th, 2025 06:17 pm
selenak: (Tardis by Pseudofriends)
[personal profile] selenak
Amindst daily political horror news and Darth Real life, there is only ever a bit of time for my fannish life.

Doctor Who, ?.01.: First episode of Ncuti Gatwa's second season. When watching the correspondoning "DW Unleashed" episode, I was intrigued to learn they started to shoot this episode - and consequently the ensuing second season - on the day The Star Beast, the first of the Fourteen/Donna specials, was broadcast. Meaning they probably finished shooting the second Gatwa season before the first was broadcast. That's certainly one way to ensure your Tiimelord doesn't run away after one season...

Anyway: plot wise, it was standard DW fare, but it was an excellent introduction to the new Companion, Belinda Chandra. I wonder whether the fact she's a Nurse by profession has something to do with the NHS and its beleagured starte (especially since when RTD scripted this episode, the Tories were still lin power?). The episode did a good show, not tell job of highlighting what she's like, how she reacts in a crisis, and what she wants (and doesn't want). Spoilery Remarks ensue. )


Daredevil Reborn and Wheel of Time: are both delivering suspenseful episodes. One way these shows are so relaxing fo rme is because I like watching, but I'm not in love, which also means I'm not defensive and don't stress out when stumbling across complaints elsewhere
oracne: turtle (Default)
[personal profile] oracne
Philadelphia Dance Projects presents Dance Up Close: Seeds and Sounds and Jumper Cables. I attended this performance with my friend Camille, who is a reviewer. The entire performance is captured below - you can even catch a glimpse of me sitting on the left, wearing a dark KN95 mask, when I leaned forward a bit before the performance started.


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hopelesse: longhair calico cat head photoshopped onto the body of a Victorian lady; my Truest Forme (Default)
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